twolittlepelicans

Friday, September 23, 2005

Preschool Adventures


So it is fall - my favorite time of the year and the kids have started preschool. I wasn't sure about this at first but thought that if Lukas was going, then Katie could go also - after all, it is only 2 days a week. The first day (Tuesday, September 6th - see attached picture) went about as I expected. Katie was SO excited she said "I go to school and sing songs and read stories and eat snack!" Lukas kept telling us he was scared and Katie would be sad with him not in the same room - this would be the first time they would be separated. So we went with him sulking and her very excited...until we walked in the door. She started clinging and he became excited at the sight of the classroom and the toys etc. We dropped him off first showing him where things were and telling him I would be right down the hall at my "Mommy meeting" (MOPS) and I would pick him up in a few hours. He walked away and started playing without a backwards glance. On to the two-year old room...EVERYONE was crying in this room - moms, kids (and I am sure the teachers were considering it), well that did it. Katie figured nothing good could come of this - if everyone else was crying this could not be a good place. So, we showed her the classroom and all of the toys and her two teachers and attempted to distract her with some of her favorite things. Well several minutes later, without success, we hesitantly left. I figured I would be fine I was going to a room with supportive moms and my experience as a teacher told me she would be fine. Well, Randy lingered in the hall and kept listening to her cry and finally we said good-bye and I went to MOPS and he went to work. The problem was, MOPS didn't start until 9:30 so I wandered around trying to help set up and keep my mind off my child who was screaming and clinging to the bottom half of the dutch door on the classroom. I have never been so torn in all my life - the teacher in me knew that the worst thing I could do was to go back to the room because it woul just start all over again. However, the mom in me kept thinking "What if she NEVER stops crying?!!?!?!???" So, I listened and listened and cried and had other moms walk over to check on her and FINALLY around 9:40 one of the moms told me they had just passed her classroom and she was playing and had stopped crying. What a tough day! I spend a lot of time second guessing myself - was she too young, had I made a terrible mistake?? Well, three weeks later I am happy to say that morning drop off is still rough at times, we have had 2 completely tear-free days but when I pick her up and hear her recount every minute of her day - the book they read, the songs they learned, having her show me her beautiful picture she painted...It is all worth it and I am sure I have made the right decision!

So I am sure that by now you are thinking "What about Lukas?" Well, let me tell you he goes in everyday, takes out his folder, puts his backpack away and hangs his name up on the "Who's here today" wall. The first week was fabulous - the second week he was sick on Tuesday and started to talk about "the hitting boy". Uh-oh. Apparently there is a "hitting boy" in his room and Lukas is who he prefers to hit. So of course, my first reaction was why is he hitting him - so I asked Lukas - "Did you take something from him?" His innocent 3-year old reply was "Well, he wouldn't share it!" So that gave me some insight. Next I attempted to use it as a lesson in compassion. I explained to Lukas that not all 3-year olds know the word "frustrated" and maybe that boy doesnt have as many words as Lukas to tell him how he feels. I told Lukas he can help that boy to use his words and that taking a toy is just as bad a decision as hitting. Well, I did talk to his teacher about it so that she could watch the both of them and maybe help them to resolve their problems with words. So, how did this little lesson go? Well, I picked him up yesterday and had my worst "mommy moment" so far. His shirt was covered in red paint - no problem we knew that they paint and it might get on their clothes. But as his teacher approaced the car with him she said "We had a little trouble listening today." (That is teacherese for "He had a bad day!") "Oh?" I managed to say. Well, he didnt want to stop painting and it was time to stop, there was lots of paint on the brush about to go everywhere so she stepped in and... He BIT her!!!! OH, MY, GOD! I wanted to DIE! As a former teacher I had no idea what to say. As his mother i could only apologize profusely and assure her we would talk about it at home - he would lose computer priveleges for 2 days and well, what else was there to say? Oh, yeah, he also took a swing at her! It just kept getting better and better. She assured me that there are several active boys in the class and they were all wound up and he wasnt alone in his "defiance" but that didn't really make me feel any better. So I took my children home - I admit i cried in the car on the way home - thoughts of him being thrown out of preschool, becoming a juvenile delinquent etc. running through my mind. So I calmed down on the way home and talked to Randy when I got home and then we both went to his room and talked to him. We explained what the consequences would be and tried to impress upon him how wrong it was to do that and that if he did it again there would be worse consequences. He just kept saying I'm sorry and when we asked him why he would do something like that his response was very "Lukas" - "She wouldn't listen to me!"
So that is the recap for the first three weeks of preschool - who knows what adventures lie ahead. I will share one more story that his teacher shared with me last week - She asked the children to come to circle to get instructions and Lukas went to the chalkboard. "Lukas, I asked you to come to circle to get instructions." Said his teacher. His reply? "I am going to write the instructions on the board." So she told him to go ahead. She thought this was pretty funny - thank God she can see the good side of him as well!